Is Sioux Falls a Good City for Vampires?
Just a few weeks ago, Sioux Falls showed up right in the middle-of-the-pack in a ranking of the 200 biggest cities in America when it came to preparedness for the Zombie Apocalypse - 105th overall.
Well, maybe the thought of the dead walking the streets doesn't worry you all that much.
Maybe what keeps you up at night is the prospect of encountering a vampire in South Dakota's largest city.
Luckily for you, the folks at Lawn Love have taken all of the guesswork out of it with their new ranking of the best and worst cities for vampires in America.
To see which cities would be most likely to host the next installment of the Twilight series, they looked at three main categories:
- Food and Drink: overall population, blood centers, blood drives
- Lair Safety: number of casket suppliers, the share of homes with basements, amount of cloud cover
- Deterrents: the amount of sunshine, number of herb and spice shops, garlic festivals, and churches
It was that last category where Sioux Falls scored the highest - 30th out of 200 in Deterrents.
As for the other categories, we were a respectable 55th in Lair Safety, but a dismal 176th in Food and Drink.
It all added up to another middle-of-the-pack performance - the 90th best vampire city in America.
If you need to get your vampire fix but don't want to waste all day getting it, there are two cities in the top ten that are just a short drive away - Omaha (top ten in Food and Drink and Lair Safety) and St. Paul (#3 in Lair Safety).
BEST CITIES FOR VAMPIRES
- Naperville, Illinois
- Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
- Chicago, Illinois
- Omaha, Nebraska
- Tacoma, Washington
- St. Paul, Minnesota
- Aurora, Illinois
- Columbus, Ohio
- Bellevue, Washington
- Paterson, New Jersey
And while Arizona, Nevada, and California may be great places for you and me to retire, their abundant sunshine makes those three states the worst for fanged, pale-skinned types.
WORST CITIES FOR VAMPIRES
- Tempe, Arizona
- Sunrise Manor, Nevada
- Enterprise, Nevada
- Tucson, Arizona
- Glendale, Arizona
- Henderson, Nevada
- Spring Valley, Nevada
- Paradise, Nevada
- Huntington Beach, California
- Santa Clarita, California