Glove Needing to Feel the Love on Cold Sioux Falls Day
I heard the cackling behind the door, curious to the origin of someone’s delight. Boy was I shocked by the discovery and by the resulting conversation.
Very seldom do people make merry in a stairwell. However, noting the elevated mood of the general public in celebration of the “Minnesota Miracle” that would have been a reasonable assumption.
Lo and behold, when the door opened and no one was present but hysterical laughter a closer investigation was warranted. The discovery was a lonely left-handed glove resting comfortably on a hand rail.
Glancing over each shoulder and peering up and down each level of risers to fully realize if this happy hand cover was actually the one whooping it up, the hilarity was confirmed. Of course, curiosity got the best of me so I had to dig more into this uncommon sight and sound.
“What’s so funny,” I offered as a weak opener to see if this glove was really having an off-of-body experience. In my experience, a good exit plan is necessary to avoid extreme embarrassment like being caught talking to inanimate objects.
“I’m having the best day of my life! I’ll take resting here instead of gripping some cold steering wheel or windshield scraper any day.”
The glove answered! Cocking my head and taking a deep breath, I knew these next few seconds would be the strangest interaction of my life.
“So you can hear me?”
“Sure. I can detect the vibrations from your voice to pick up what you’re saying. With those kind of pipes I can tell you’re no George Clooney, but who else is?”
Great. A glove that gives back-handed compliments.
“Glad to be out of the cold are you?”
“Heavens, yes. This winter has been a tough one on me so far and I’m finally free from bondage. I mean, how hard is it to get a manicure these days or at least use some moisturizer. It’s like a beached fish sliding in and out multiple times a day. Drives me crazy.”
“What if old scaly digits never comes back to get you? I don’t see you as the solitary type there, Lefty. Serving in a noble way would be more satisfying than your current fate of dormancy. I mean that Pekingese will have to find a new object to stuff under the couch with the rest of the little treasures.”
“Don’t remind me.”
“Come on, Brother Glove. The cold can’t last forever and your friend on the right is going to miss your lively discussions. I mean, you’re on the opposite side of things. Unless you don’t know what the other hand is doing. That’s right. Of course you don’t. Just wanted to point that out.”
“Boy if that isn’t that a slap in the face.”
“Another thing you’d miss. Anyway I’ve got to go. You’ve been quite a handful.”
“I will hand it to you, stranger. You’ve shown me that I need to get a grip.”
A pitter-patter of Pekingese draws closer which foreshadows a reunion of frigid fingers to the warm confines of leather covered protection.
“I’ve got a feeling you’ll be back in a hands-on situation real soon. Take care, Lefty.”
“Like a glove.”