A Little Boy Was Billed for Missing Another Kid’s Birthday Party
So, I started the week by coming across this:
I saw this after overhearing a parent of an eight and six year old complaining how they have to spend every weekend at children's birthday parties. This has caused me to go full Jerry Seinfeld: What's the deal with kids birthday parties?
I am generally anti-birthday celebrations. Hooray your parents successfully passed their DNA to the next generation. Congratulations, you have something in common with every other living thing on earth. But, for kids I'll relax my prohibition a bit.
I remember kids birthdays being a flimsy excuse for a family get-together. I have cousins that if I would see them in person now I have to think to myself, "Who's birthday is? Is it Christmas already?" Isn't a birthday just where you have some cake, open a present from your parents and a card from grandma, play Super Mario with your two friends and your cousin, then they go home then you get to choose what's for dinner that night? Probably pizza, unless you were one of those kids that would want lamb because you always watch the cooking shows on PBS that came on after 3-2-1 Contact.
Often when I say something about this I get the ole chestnut 'Well, you have to invite every kid in the class.' There's no choice; it's policy, the law, and ancient tradition handed down from the Founding Fathers in the Declaration of Independence and upheld in several landmark Supreme Court rulings. It's inscribed on Mt. Rushmore just below Roosevelt's mustache: 'Thou shall be forever inviting all the members of Ms. Teacher's 2nd grade class to your child's birthday party. And you are henceforth required to choose a theme in-line with current movie based marking campaigns.' I never heard of this practice outside of upper-middle class whiny talking points.
Now, the parents issuing the invoice in the above British birthday billing brouhaha are dumb. Dumb for planning a big party and dumb for caring if someone showed up. They have fallen into the trap of using their children to try and show-off. I will say to the parents of the child that was billed; this is actually a good thing. You now know who not to talk to, who to avoid. You no longer have to worry 'are these people weird or is it just me?' You have definitive proof that it's not just you. This a teachable moment for your child. He'll learn early on that life is much better when you can identify and avoid the dumb people.