Cameron Simcik

We really, really love 'Star Wars.' And by "love" we mean we're borderline obsessed. The only thing that could make it better is if small dogs somehow got involved. Which is to say, it just got better. These dogs display almost as much love as we feel for the fantasy franchise.

Read More|Comment

The thought of committing ourselves to one lady for the rest of our lives makes us break out in a cold sweat while nervously scratching our junk. The scratching is probably something else though.

Read More|Comment

If you know how to work the system, you can become a rich man pretty easily these days. Want a free iPhone? Just show off that teeny weeny of yours on a Danish porn site. What about an overpriced reptile? Down a few dozen roaches, avoid death, and BAM-- that $850 snake is yours. But for most of us, the whole “working the system” thing isn’t in the cards, because we’re dumb.

Read More|Comment

There’s one single treat in the history of all candy deliciousness that makes us feel so torn. Candy corn -- we hate to love it and love to hate it. How is it possible it can taste so bad, yet be so irresistible? It’s a Halloween trick AND treat. (See what we did there?)

Read More|Comment

We know not all junk is created equally, but we have our fellow lady friends to thank for creating a “good” and “bad” standard-- the big italian sausage versus the cocktail weenie. It’s tough enough being a guy, and having subpar manhood is just grounds for living a life akin to Rainy Day Randy’s. But over in Denmark, small packages are finally snagging the spotlight, if only briefly.

Read More|Comment

Dogs really are man's best friends. They’re adorable and they look out for us humans when things go awry. Recently we’ve met the German Shepherd who found a missing doctor, a Chihuahua who sniffed out two lost girls, and now, the rescue dog who saved a baby’s life.

Read More|Comment

Funerals suck. We don’t like to get into that sappy crap. Unless of course said funeral involves half-naked women, because half-naked women make any situation a thousand times better. Well folks, our twisted dreams have come true

Read More|Comment

There's one thing we know for sure about little kids-- they can make practically anything seem adorable. Scrunched-up, twisted sour faces? Check. A boppin' on a bed rendition of Michael Jackson's 'Thriller'? You betcha! Although we're a little dumbfounded as to how this "everything is ridiculously adorable" thing actually happens, we can't help but be sucked into the cuteness every darn time. This is especially true when it comes to Halloween.

Read More|Comment

With Halloween just a few weeks away and our obsession with dressed-up animals still going strong, we have been led into the most wonderful of all Tumblr lands with our latest discovery.

Read More|Comment

It’s rough being a two-year-old these days. Mom and dad don’t understand half the stuff that goes down at the playground, so it’s the duty of siblings to offer advice, keep them in check and give a little tough love.

Read More|Comment