There’s really no clever way to say this, so we’ll just come out and say it: a woman in China was caught on-camera pooping on an elevator in a subway station.

The video has gone viral in the country and left us to wonder just how bad the public restrooms are there.

The woman hunkers down to fire out the Swiss missile while her husband -- clearly going above and beyond the duties described in their vows -- appears to hold a button to make sure the doors don’t open on her because, hey, that would be disgusting, right? (Guess she didn’t want to make a commode-tion. Get it, like 'commotion?')

Perhaps the most amazing thing is that people are walking by while she gives her excretory system a workout. So, no one can walk in, but they’re more than welcome to get an eyeful. Better an eyeful than noseful, we suppose.

After the woman finishes, the door opens up and the couple walk out, leaving behind a rather vile surprise for the next people to get in.

This woman is either brave or crazy -- brave for taking care of business in such a public place or crazy for doing so in a public place that attracts germs in a number exceeded only by the number of homeless milling around the platform around 3 a.m. on any given day.

Why would someone go dookie on the floor of a subway elevator? Well, it is China, after all, and there are a lot of people, so maybe there just aren’t enough stalls available to accommodate everyone. Got any better theories?